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     What is beauty? It`s been said that "beauty is in the eye of the beholder." Although we always try to define beauty in physical form, that definition is always changing; beauty is rarely defined in words. Is it something concrete, or is it an abstract idea? Is it something one can hold, or something one can lose? Can beauty be created, or destroyed? Can it be bought in a can, in a bottle, or in a tube?

     People love beauty. It is what makes people attractive. Even though one does not have a firm grasp of the idea of real beauty, many women and men are allured by that power of attraction, and so strive to be beautiful. They believe that the only way to be beautiful is to buy this, wear that, soak this, don`t eat that, apply this, shave that, work-out this, wax that. But beauty isn`t something that can be bought or created instantly. It is the ability to accept people as they are -- their charms, their faults, their hurts. And as with any skill or ability, it can be learned.

     I don`t refute the idea of outer beauty. But when people believe that they myst devote most of their time and effort into making themselves `beautiful,` it becomes a dangerous situation. As there are many women and men who use natural/artificial outer beauty as a weapon (as their way of manipulating others, they believe that the only power worth attaining is the power of attraction. And when the outer beauty fades with the passage of time, they are left with no power at all.

     We gather from the definition of beauty that relationships play a major role of defining a person`s inner beauty. In the beginning of a relationship, it`s very easy to see the good. Society teaches us to accept nothing less than perfect. Unfortunately, people are so wrapped up in their misconception of beauty -- the reason they are in love -- that they either fail to see the imperfections and accept them, or fool themselves into believing the imperfections don`t exist.

     And as soon as his faults begin to surface, she begins to see his `imperfections,` and may want to distance herself from him. He, seeing how she doesn`t accept that he has faults, sees her as being less beautiful, less attractive, and less worthy of love. Rinse, lather, repeat.

     It may be even more hurtful when one`s hurts are involved. If she begins to share her hurts with him -- her problems, with her friends, burdens with siblings, parents -- he may try to run away from her; why should he burden himself with her problems? When she sees what he is doing, the same thing happens -- he becomes less beautiful in her eyes. Not only that, but now that she has exposed herself to emotional pain, she will probably get hurt.

     If she would only accept even the tiniest personality `flaw` that she could identify in him, if he would only accept her problems, no matter how difficult or trivial, and help carry those burdens... beauty would be displayed in it`s truest form -- as the ability to accept a person in their completeness and totality.

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     It is human nature to be attracted to beauty. That`s why i have a girlfriend. She tells me she`s not beautiful, no matter how many different ways i tell her otherwise. She is the most beautiful woman I have ever met -- not only because of the outer beauty she denies having, but because of her inner beauty, that which I seen and witnessed -- that which I have tried to make her realize. She accepts me as I am, with all my hurts, with all my faults, with all my shortcomings. I don`t have much to offer her as a jobless college without a car (anymore). Yet she acepts what little I can offer -- my listening ear, my life experiences, my thoughts, my patience, my shoulder for her to lean on, my writings, my love -- and she accepts it with the grace of a princess, of a queen.

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Jackie, you are beautiful.
I don`t know how else to tell you.
Thank you, for being `beautiful` to me.

You are beautiful.
Inside and out.

i love you.

perhaps i could be your king one day......... ;)