the grass is always greener... pt.2

Sarah's friend she lost her mind;
she left him and made it look sexy and all.
You fear I won't be far behind --
-- thinking I'll be the next to leave.
I know I might be anxious, but... I'm still not crazy. And...

I don't need another kind of green to know
I'm on the right side with you

I used to be the one you saw
crying alone to sad songs.
But then we go and hit the wall:
when nothing has changed and nothing's wrong!
You're not the perfect hand, but... I don't hit on nineteen. And...

I don't need another kind of green to know
I'm on the right side...
I'm on the right side with you

Someday you'll drift away from me...
Adopt some new philosophy
That doesn't keep the two of us in mind
Move into someone else's place, and
Stare into some other's eyes, and
Slowly only come to realize... that

You didn't need another kind of green to know
I'm on the right side...
Yours was the right side(!)
I'm on the right side with you...

- john mayer - another kind of green

---

i've been a love/hate relationship over the past few weeks... with this song. love; because it's another song that i can relate to.. it expresses some of the things i've felt over the past couple of years. hate; in that i feel it cut into the point it makes so deeply... and it makes me wonder:

God, will i ever be on the right side with You again?

...To phrase something once written to me long ago... to fully receive all the blessings he can give... my hands must be empty -- of all things.

Are my scared hands at all worthy of these blessings? or for any more of them?

...There is little to confess. He's already taken most of what was in my hands at the start -- when i opened them again. ...But there is also little time. But even still, the point has been made: reconcilation is needed.

I hope I make it in time. ...else, i'll never know the kind of pasture God has on his side of the fence. Perhaps it is greener.

"...open up your fist; this fallen world
doesn't hold your interest, it
doesn't hold your soul..."

- switchfoot - daisy