For posterity's sake.

posted here.

When you break it down to its roots, I feel that the question becomes...should i break up with someone for the sole purpose of going out with someone else? anyone who is confused about how they feel towards two people.... ultimately realizes that they love neither of them. When the question is phrased for what it really is (instead using the technicalities of 'good' and 'better')... one finds selfishness in their thoughts, for nit-picking between the qualities they like and dislike between the two. when we are truly in love (especially during that bliss period), we accept everything about that one person. ....everything!

in your scenarios (without giving any background storyline), if one picks the new person, "oh, if i only stuck it through a while longer with them, i wonder how things would've turned out?" << especially if circumstances change for the worse. if they stay with the familiar, "oh, what if i took that chance with other person?" << again, especially if circumstances change for the worse.

.....in either situation, a descision has to be made, so that no one is left 2nd-guessing their actions. love usually begins as a feeling, but as we go further down the line.... it's also a decision to love. and to keep loving. and to love, despite whatever circumstances we find ourselves in. and to love, despite the little quirks and flaws we discover in that person.

even despite what my heart feels... if (for example) God has already revealed that the more loving thing to do for them is to let them go, then... (don't miss the point -- you do this for them, not just so you can go off with that other person....)

on the flip side, if (for example) I must break ties with this new person to guarantee that i won't regret anything later on towards my current 'significant other,' then...

Personally, and especially over the past year, I've learned to take my cue from Jesus: "Father, if you would let this cup pass over me, please!! I'm scared to be crucified!!! ...but if it's in Your will, Lord, then... i'll do it for You. And for them."

[Sorry. This is a blog in itself. I could give examples, but I'm curious to see how this discussion goes... msn or email me!]

Posted 4/15/2006 at 2:14 PM by bobo929